Eddie Gil Jokes

Artista na si Eddie Gil. Di nakaporma sa politika, pero rumaratsada na sa showbiz. At ngayon, kumakalat na ang mga Eddie Gil Jokes. Paano ba ‘yan, Erap?

Ngapala, yung page ko na puro feedback ng mga fans at di fans ni Eddie Gil, ginawan ko ng sariling address: http://www.eddiegil.tk. Pero kung gusto ninyo ay iyong what looks like his official web site, go to EddieGil.org.

Medyas
Isang alalay: Boss Eddie Gil, bakit magkaiba ang medyas mo? Isang green, isang red.
Eddie Gil: Ewan ko nga kung saan ito nabili ni Misis. May isang pares pa ako na ganito sa bahay.

Eddie Gil Makes a Wish
Eddie Gil shows a map of the Philippines to a genie and wishes that all the islands be connected by fly-overs.
Genie: I’m not that good. Make another wish!
Eddie Gil: Okay. Make me intelligent!
Genie: Can i see the map again?

Eddie Gil calling a hotel receptionist.
Eddie Gil: Paano ako makakalabas dito sa kuwarto ko?
Receptionist: Bakit po sir, ano pong problema sa mga pinto?
Eddie Gil: Dalawa lang ang pinto. Ang isa pag bukas ko banyo. ‘Yung isa naman may nakasabit na “do not disturb.”

Medical Exam
Eddie Gil is appearing for his University final examination. He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window. He then removes his shirt and throws it away as well. His pants, socks and watch follow suit. The nurse, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on. “Miss, I am only following the instructions, ” he says, ” it says here, “Answer the following questions in brief’.”

Elevator
Eddie Villanueva: Sorry I’m late! brownout! na stuck sa elevator for one hour
Eddie Gil: Wala yan ako three hours sa escalator.

Six or Eight
Eddie Gil calls into a take-out pizza parlor.
Pizza man: Would you like your pizza sliced into six or eight?
Eddie Gil: Six, I don’t think I could eat eight.

Ballerina
While watching a ballerina tip toeing on stage, Eddie Gil commented: “Ang tanga naman ng direktor! Bakit hindi na lang sya kumuha ng matangkad?!”

In a coffee shop:
Eddie Gil: 1 coffee please
Waiter: Decaf, sir?
Eddie Gil: Of course! Debaso is too big and too much for me!

Pizzeria
While in a pizzeria.
Eddie Gil : What are your specialties?
Waiter : Sir, we serve all kinds of pizza.
Eddie Gil : Talaga, bigyan mo nga ako ng Shakey’s!!

Science Class
In a science class.
Classmate : Bakit yung airplane pag umiikot ang elisi, uma-angat sa lupa? Bakit yung bentilador kahit umiikot, nasa mesa pa din?
Eddie Gil : Tanga ka pala eh! Kasi yung bentilador may kurdon!

There was a magic mirror that ate liars.
An ugly person stood in front of it and said: I think I’m CUTE! – kinain siya.
Then, a fat person stood in front of it and said: I think I’m SEXY! – kinain siya.
Then, Eddie Gil stood in front of it and said: I think… – kinain na.